When I think of you, it puts a smile on my face. And when I talk to you, I forget everything else. Sometimes I can't say a word, because I'm just so overwhelmed with how I feel. You stop my heart, but yet you keep it going somehow. Sometimes, when I'm alone and I think of you, my chest feels tight, and at those moments, I want to tell you how I feel about you... how much I love you... how much I appreciate every single thing that you do for me.It doesn't matter if I'm upset, angry, sad... just don't forget that no matter what I'm going through, my heart will always be with you. You make me happy. I only hope that I make you as happy as you make me. I love you with everything I've got, with every piece of my soul, my heart.

I just love you. Remember that. <3

These days, I don't like dreaming at all. Why are you bothering me? I don't want to see you, even in dreams. This is probably the fifth time I've seen you. It's starting to get ridiculous. I'm not thinking of you. So why?

Go away.

I'm sorry for getting upset at you these past two days. I had my reasons, but realizing how much you do care... well, it made me realize this issue is done and over with and I have to move on. I'd write a lot more here, but I'd basically be repeating everything I just said. I'll try my best to be more open with you. There's just a big part of me that doesn't want to say certain things, because I don't like arguing, I don't like being mad/upset... especially at you. The last I want to do is yell at you. I seriously hope we can make this work. It's just that the past two days, and just the small issues got me thinking about the big picture... and I got scared that maybe you weren't as serious about this as I thought you were. Anyway... I'm rambling... again. It's really difficult right now for me, seeing my friends together, taking their pictures, when I should be doing that for us. What makes it even more difficult is me wondering, if we'll ever be able to actually stay together. I told you... I don't want have a relationship with just phone calls and letters or whatever... eventually, I do want us to be together. (That was another issue I had been tossing around in my brain for a while) I know that you have school, and I don't mind waiting for another year and a half. But after that... well, you know what I mean. I miss you... a lot. But I'm sure you already know that.

... I love you Ben.